The problems

My client numbers are down. In the past 6-8 months my schedule has dropped from 18-20 appointments a week to 14-16 appointments a week.

At the same time my office expenses have increased substantially over the past few years. The cost of utilities is way up, as are the prices for linens, detergent (luckily my laundry service hasn't raised their fees, but I bring in my own detergent & fabric softener because I like the hippie stuff), lubricants and general office supplies.

What I'm already doing

I've gotten back to regular Open Appointment emails at the beginning of each week and I'm going to get better at regularly posting on my facebook page to keep me in front of client's eyes.

Since recognizing the increase in expenses (after I did my 2012 taxes) I've made some changes at the office. I cancelled my office internet, and in return for an hour of marketing help once a month I use my landlord's wifi. I buy cheaper toilet paper and paper towels (but not too cheap). In January, the rent I charge my 2 tenants will increase slightly. I'm back to cleaning my own office instead of paying someone.

Things I won't compromise

I will not buy crappy oils and lotions. I do not want toxic ickyness soaking into my skin for 20-odd hours a week. I do not want my clients leaving the office feeling slimy and gross.

I will not work more night or weekend hours. I am sticking with my 3 nights a week, and 2 out of 3 Saturdays. I throw a Sunday in once every 8 weeks or so when I can. It's important to me to leave time for my personal life, which was neglected for far too long. The holes I need to fill are in the daytime.

What would you do next?

Any suggestions? Have you been in this situation, and how did you handle it? Share in the comments!

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I've been thinking a lot lately about professionalism and ethics. Specifically, the differences between them, and the applications of those definitions on our actions and words as massage therapists.

I've labored over various definitions. I've looked at situations where I've used the words interchangeably and probably incorrectly. I've though about where I've used each word properly. And I've come to a conclusion.

I kinda don't care about getting the exact verbiage right.

I care about the meaning, the intent, and the context of any particular interaction. What follows is the story of how I started thinking about this.

I saw a funny graphic on Facebook. It was pretty funny. It said, " Crazy Client Request "I want extra work on my neck, but don't mess up my hair."" Lots of people commented on how funny it was. A few hundred people have shared it. Because it's funny. And true. We know it happens all the time.

But it bothers me. It bothers me that a few hundred massage therapists think it's okay to publicly joke about client requests. (Side note: I expressed this in the comments under the image and got nailed. Rightly so. I know better than to start a fight on someone else's turf. I should've just sent a message to the page owner. I've apologized for that. I was an asshat.)

Plenty of people disagree with me and think I'm being a tightass. They are correct. I am a tightass. My question is: Why aren't they?

If a client walked into your office and said, "I've got an awful headache, but please don't get oil in my hair, I've got to go back to work after this," would you actually say, "That's a crazy request, hahahah!" Would you holler out to a colleague, "Hey, Jane, check it out, this client wants me to work on her head but not get oil in her hair. HA!" Probably not.

Shouldn't we all be extra sensitive about accidentally, or intentionally, saying something that may make a client afraid to speak up, or afraid to come to us?

Let's apply this to real life

Let's say a very shy person, a potential client, is following your Facebook page. They enjoy your posts about stretching, the links to local community events, and the occasional picture of your silly office antics. They're warming up to the idea of getting massage as they get to know you through your marketing.

Then, they see a joke titled Crazy Client Request. A joke made at the expense of a client. What's the underlying message here? If you ask your massage therapist for something, they may make fun of you. Publicly. It's pretty safe to assume that the shy person will never step foot in your office.

Is this an extreme line of thinking? Yes. As it should be. When we're talking about the feelings of clients, about accidentally intimidating someone, alienating an otherwise ideal potential client, or about hurting a current client's feelings, we should absolutely think in extremes.

In the most extreme of circumstances, this man committed suicide. He refused to seek help because throughout his childhood he heard his parents and other medical practitioners breech confidentiality and make sport of their mentally ill patients.

Jokes about hair are not extreme. They are silly and funny. But it's a slippery slope, and a very easy connection for an already shy person to make.

Ummmm, Allissa? Aren't you a preacher of Marketing with Personality?

Yup. I even have an adorable ebook about it! (Go get it, it's free.) I'm a big fan of letting your personality shine through in your business.

But let's be clear, there's a big difference between being silly enough to display a Darth Vader cookie jar in your office, and actively making fun of a client.

Marketing with Personality isn't about casually treating your clients like crap. It's about being human, warm, and fun in your business. And if you're too busy to download the ebook, no worries, here's the important stuff:

You want to be yourself. But you want to be a professional version of yourself. This is a huge topic, we could spend endless chapters on boundaries. Here are some potential land mines to be aware of, and avoid.

Be yourself, unless...

You’re a jerk. If you're surly and grumpy and super-sarcastic, rein it in. I’m not suggesting that you flip into Happy Cheerleader mode whenever a client walks in the door. Just consider the way your edges could be smoothed to improve the client’s experience.

You’re a flirt. If you're a highly sexualized person, very flirty and touchy, rein it in. When you are anywhere that could be a marketing/networking possibility, stop it. Don’t do a giggle and a hair flip, don’t talk about sex. Don’t. Just don’t.

Take some time to explore what your weakness are. Recognize them, and have a plan in place to diffuse these land mines before they explode.

Be yourself, unless...

You’ve got a guilt complex. If you're someone who likes to give and give, and you tend to overcommit and overwork yourself trying to help others in all aspects of your life, rein it in. It's simply not an effective way to run a business, it's not a healthy way to work.

You’re a pushover with your schedule. Stop it. Find the easy ways to say no. Practice saying “I'm sorry, I'm booked up.” Get cozy referring out to MT's who work on your days off.

It's important to acknowledge that there should be real thought involved in this process. These guidelines are not One Size Fits All. We're not talking about ignoring ethical concerns and getting casual at your place of business. This is a process, and like any other aspect of business, you need to use good judgement and common sense.

So for me, I think of it this way: I may have clients leave because they don't like my hands-on techniques. I may have potential clients who never come in because they see an occasional atheist sentiment in my twitter stream. I'm okay with that. But if I ever lose a client or potential client because they felt I was insensitive to their needs, or they feared I would make fun of them, I will consider that a huge professional failure. Huge.

For you: Well, you've got to figure that out for yourself. Consider your feelings. Consider the feelings of the people who will see what you 'like' and post on Facebook, and interact accordingly.

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I suppose in every massage blogger's life there's got to be an obligatory post about hands. This is mine. This was written in December 2010 and has been sitting in my drafts folder since then. 

When I was a kid, I would play with my mother’s hands. In church, mostly, to entertain me during the very long sermons and the praying I didn’t understand. I would spin the ring on her finger, trace the blood vessels and bones, move the fingers around a bit and at some point, I realized that my hands were shaped like hers. Not just in a ‘looks like a hand’ way, but the specific structure and intricacies, the distinct shape of the knuckles that was different from my dad’s or brother’s. I think that was when I started to grasp the notion that people look like their genetic relations. Further investigation revealed that I have my dad’s nose and ears, my mom’s hair, etc. My brother and I share a mix of physical characteristics that can’t be clearly traced to either parent alone, but are illustrative of their combined efforts at making life.

Then sometime later in my pre-teen-ish years, I was with my mom’s mom, my mémère, and I discovered her hands were the same as mine. And I made the connection much more quickly this time. I thought it was amazing that I had a clear image of what a part of me would look like as I aged. So throughout my youth and young adulthood, I kept an eye on Mémère’s hands. She aged well. Mémère was a pretty good looking woman. This pleases me on many levels. I like that I come from good stock, pretty women who age well. I like that Mémère was a soft, kind grandmother who didn’t take a lot of crap from us kids. I like that her house always smelled like soup. I like that when we had the occasional sleepover, she served us generic cheese curls in recycled little margarine containers and re-used aluminum foil like it was a commodity. I LOVE that she swore when she played cards.

Soon after my Pépère died several years ago she moved to an assisted living facility, and as the Alzheimer’s progressed, into a nursing home. When I visited, not often enough, I’m sure, I massaged her hands.  I think it was more to give me something to do, and feel less awkward while visiting, while watching her turn into a shell, really.

from the last visit

I visited Mémère a few months ago. I assumed she didn’t know who I was, and we chatted (well, I did most of the chatting) about unimportant things. I babbled about the decor in the nursing home, I told her about my job, made idle conversation about my new apartment and my blue hair. Then, almost suddenly, she looked me straight in the eye and said, “Are you alone?” The clarity cut like a knife, bursting my balloon of cheer and letting the failure of my marriage, loss of my stepdaughter woosh out. (Which in many ways is ridiculous, because she may well have been asking if I brought someone else to visit her, as my brother and I had done this together a few times.)  I paused and said, “Yes, I am alone, and it’s good. I’m okay.” I babbled a little more about the apartment, proudly stating that I liked living by myself and keeping the place simple. And she responded again with piercing lucidity, “So you have nothing.”  I replied, “Well, Mémère, I have everything I need” And she went back to her slightly glazed state.  After a few more minutes of small-talk I got the hell out of there as fast as I could. That may have been a little more insight than I needed, and certainly more than I expected.

Mémère died last week. There are still rifts in the family, and the anxiety about the upcoming rituals made it difficult to mourn. Further, there is nothing that makes one feel quite so helpless as when your parents are struggling with loss and pain themselves. All in all, the services went well. My nieces and nephews made me so proud. The kindness of some family members was so very appreciated and took the sting out of the verbal slaps delivered by a small-minded relative trying to start a rumble. Twice. There has already been the selfish ‘taking of my mémère’s stuff,’ (actually, a petty uncle did that before she even died) and I’m sure he’ll keep my grandparent's picture meant for my mother, and anything else he got his hands on. (I hope you're enjoying that collage of my skydiving photos that I brought to mémère last year, Richard!)

And yet, I can’t be bothered by all that. Because I am my mother’s daughter, and I have my mémère’s hands. That’s more than enough for me.

This post is #5? of a 31 day blog challenge in which I am woefully behind.

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I'm not perfect. I've made my share of errors and at some point in the past 8 years, I've  probably been guilty of both of these sins. But I know better now, and so should you.

Hide income

It's no secret that many massage therapists pocket cash tips and payments and don't report that income on taxes. This is common in many service industries. It's a bad idea for several reasons.

• If you keep your gross income crazy-low, you'll have a hard time getting loans. Car loans, business loans when it's time to expand, and a mortgage if you ever want to buy residential or commercial property.
• You may well get caught. The IRS is well aware of this trend and keeps their eye on service providers. Getting audited and paying back taxes is no picnic.
• It screws up your record keeping. Nowadays many clients need year end reports to calculate how much money they've spent on massage. If you're pocketing the money, but giving them a receipt for the payment, that's a discrepancy the IRS will notice.
• You're a liar. Yeah, I said it. Every time you take money from a client and don't include it in your income reported on taxes you are a liar. It doesn't matter if you don't like how your taxes are spent. It doesn't matter if you 'think taxes are unconstitutional'. You are a liar and you are breaking the law. Either that keeps you up at night or it doesn't, but own it. You are a liar.
• It's likely, even though you lie and don't pay your share of taxes, that you are still benefiting from the services provided by taxpayers. The fire department will come to your house when you call them. Maybe you've got running water from a public water supply. Your kids go to public school. You drive on roads cared for by the local, state and federal governments.

Ethics of record-keeping and financial reporting are just as important as the ethics of hands-on practice. Also, if you don’t report all your income, you are a liar. (But I may have mentioned that already.)

What’s the solution? It’s easy. Record and report every damn penny you earn in your tax filings. Check your greed at the door.

Verbally violate scope of practice

The scope of practice for massage therapists is a moving target and varies according to where you live and work. This can cause some ethical issues when you have an idea of what’s going on and want your client to seek care or perhaps get a second opinion about an issue. Nonetheless, it’s against the law in many places for a massage therapist to say any of the following:

• It’s a lipoma, a fatty tumor, nothing to worry about.
• That mole looks fine to me.
• You tore a rotator cuff tendon.
• It’s not carpal tunnel.
• You’re dehydrated.
• If you’re getting lots of colds, you need a nutritional supplement.
• This herb can help you with that insomnia.

While you are acting in the role of a massage therapist those statements may be violating your scope of practice. They may be perfectly legal things to say over coffee with a friend, when you are not their health and wellness provider. But all of the above are statements that could be construed as diagnosis or medical advice that you are not allowed to give.

What’s the solution? This one is tricky. You’ll have to get cozy just saying, “I’m not sure what’s happening here, and it’s really out of my scope as a massage therapist determine that. I think you should see a physical therapist/neurologist/podiatrist/chiropractor/medical doctor and get that properly looked at.” Check your ego at the door.

Moral of this story? Don't do these things.

This post is #4 of a 31 day blog challenge. 

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In my handful of years being single, I've noticed a trend among the dating community (aka- other single people). They say things like, "I just want to meet the 'right' person," and other hazy crap like, "I'll know when I meet him, we'll just click, there will be chemistry." And then those same people bitch and moan about all the awful dates they waste time on.

I've used a few different online dating sites in the past few years. In 90% of profiles, the same trend occurs. People are vague about their own characteristics, and similarly blurry about what they're looking for in a partner. It goes like this:

I like to go out, sometimes I like to stay in…I like all kinds of music and I'm looking for someone cool to hang out with. <Insert obligatory photo of guy in NE Patriots jersey holding either a beer or a friend's baby here. Really.>

Yeah, that's not helping anyone, buddy. And women do the same thing. (I know because I check out the competition's profiles. But girls tend to use more 'hiking in the woods' pics. What is that about?)

I'm not vague or confused about who I am. Nor am I uncertain about what I'm looking for in a partner. I lay it all out very clearly. It looks something like this:

Me: Gainfully self-employed, child-free, not afraid to sing along loudly to Careless Whisper in any environment. I like who I am, I like my life. It would be nice to meet someone to share that with. Preferably, someone who doesn't mind that I ended that sentence with a preposition.

I'm comfortably situated on the spectrum somewhere between women with lots of outdoorsy hiking pics and girls in revealing outfits making the duck face in a selfie. I like heels but can't stand makeup or jewelry. I'm hilarious on twitter, fiercely independent, but I still really, really like it when men open doors and display other chivalrous behaviors. I would like to see some dragon-slaying and defending of my honor should the need arise. That just sounds awesome, right? I also have no trouble taking charge of a situation. I'm versatile like that.

I am firmly in defense of the oxford comma, one space after a period, and an occasional well-placed cuss word to make a point in otherwise civilized conversation. I think grammar and spelling are important, but people who are dicks about it need to calm the hell down. In a recent quest for some hobbies, I've taken up learning to make old-school mixed drinks and playing the ukulele. They pair well together. I don't want to brag here, but I can play almost any song on my ukulele. Unless there's a B minor. Or an F minor 7. Alright I only know about 6 chords, but I rock them. I rock them hard.

You: Fun, funny and smart. What? Were you expecting me to want a boring, humorless, stupid dude? I'm very much looking for a guy who has his crap together. Seriously. I'm not looking for a fixer-upper. None of us has it entirely figured out, but it would be nice to hang out with someone who likes his work, his life, and is generally happy. If you could commit to always reaching things on the top shelf and opening pickle jars whenever needed, that's cool, too. I want you to pay for the first date, and I want to cover the second. Kids are awesome, but if you've got little ones (or big ones) at home, we're probably not a good match right now. (But thanks for populating the earth!)

If any of this rings a bell, I hope I hear from you.

Yeah. I still get contacted by guys who don't in any way meet the parameters I've set. Dudes in major career transitions, guys who hate their jobs and whine about it in the first email, men with full custody of a gaggle of kids under the age of 10. But because I know what I'm looking for, it's easy to weed them out quickly.

Also, because I'm clear, the guys I've met and dated have been great. In fact, I'm convinced the matching process is darn effective, since I'm very good friends with a few. The romance wasn't a keeper but the compatibility stuck on a friendship level. That's pretty cool.

I had to suffer through some icky dates to figure all this out. Finally, I actually sat down and said, "This is what I want in a partner," and made a list. Icky dates dramatically decreased, leaving room for the better ones. Occasionally, a guy who doesn't quite fit the criteria will wow me in some other way. I've bent some rules and ended up having some really fun dates and made great friends. But more often than not, staying focussed on what I truly want has served me well.

But this isn't a dating blog, so let's move on

In all my teaching and reading about massage and marketing, I've found the most common obstacle for a massage therapist is figuring out what she wants. Often, defining what kind of clients a therapist wants to treat, their Ideal Client, is what entirely halts an otherwise motivated person in their marketing efforts.

Have you seen those therapists who list six different 'specialties' on their business cards? It kinda stops being special after two. When asked, "Who is your Ideal Client?" the response is "Everyone!" Well, everyone may benefit from your massage, but successful marketing depends on figuring out who you most want to serve, assessing their needs, and sharing how your services meet those needs. You've got to nail it down, be precise. Know who you are and who you can best serve.

I've got advanced training in Prenatal, Labor and Postnatal massage and I specialize in helping women feel educated, comfortable and relaxed throughout pregnancy and the transition into motherhood.

If you are a mom-to-be experiencing physical discomfort or just nervous about the process, you're exactly my kind of client! Massage has been shown to decrease depression, anxiety and pain for pregnant women, and massage may be just what you need. Call for more information or to book an appointment.

When you first get out of school, you may not know exactly where you want to go with massage. Start somewhere. Think about your favorite practice 'clients'. Was there an age group you most enjoyed woking with? A specific pathology that lit you up and made you run to your reference book excitedly? Start there. Write down the characteristics of those clients and pathologies. List how you and your amazing massage skills can serve them. Then put that out to the world. Focus on finding those clients and serving them well.

Network with other massage therapists and health professionals, be sure they know what you do and make extra sure to understand what they do. Focussing on one market doesn't mean that you blow off any potential client with different pathologies or needs, but be wise about referring out if you know someone who may serve them better. It'll come back ten-fold. It can be a rough process to figure out what you want. It's worth the effort.

Much like love, marketing can be brutal. Much like love, you gotta do the work to make it great.

This post is #3 of a 31 day blog challenge. 

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• Welcome to Our Independence Day

-or- Here's your fish.

So it's been just over three years since we started here in Blue Streak Land. (Or, as I measure time, four residences and six guys ago.) What began as a way to share some (hopefully) useful tips about massage business and marketing has evolved into a beautiful, vibrant community of kick-ass massage therapists who play pretty well together. (<-- I can't tell you how much that pleases me. Thanks, everyone.)

We've done a whole bunch of teaching and learning over at Michael Reynolds' brain child, the Massage Learning Network, too. We've covered topics like How to use Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn. We've talked about customer service in general and business practices specifically. And through all this I was focused on teaching you theory, the how's of relationship-building as it applies to marketing. And the How-To's of the various technologies. I've been teaching you to fish. You've been hustling and learning.

But the thing is, the pond (internet) is reeealy big. And the fish (content) are reeealy small and kinda hard to find. And bait is really icky to touch. Ummmmm. Whoops. My bad.

So, here's your fish

You don't have time to be paddling around, looking for awesome stuff to post on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn. You're too busy juggling families and day jobs along with your massage gig.

The Alternative Marketing Project is designed help massage therapists amp up their marketing, by giving you the content, so you don't have to hunt (fish) for it. Each month, the team will provide timely topics, blog and email content, shareworthy infographics, useful links, and more, right to your inbox. And it’s FREE, because every massage therapist deserves the chance to build the practice of their dreams. And you shouldn't have to pay some asshats in a big corporate office for it.

It is not a total solution. You'll still have to put a little effort in, customize the blog posts, add more content according to your massage specialty and your clients' interests. But the bulk of it is here, and it is done for you. Because ain't nobody got time for that.

How do we know that? Because everyone one of the five contributors and creators of this project is a practicing massage therapist. We get it. We understand. We are blown away, humbled, honored by the response so far. (Side note, you'll be hearing more about the collective "we" next week.) In just a week, we've gotten nearly 1,000 subscribers. Holy cow. I mean, whoa. Like, I just saw it pop up in a Facebook group, posted by someone I don't know. That is SO COOL.

If you haven't already, you can sign up here to get in. If you want even more details, Kat wrote some good stuff over here, too.

Image courtesy of  SOMMAI/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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