No doubt if you’re on Facebook, you’ve seen the current meme going around about not being allowed to say, “Merry Christmas” and having to say “Happy Holidays” instead. As is often the case, it’s an outdated, not-really-truthful sentiment that gets people all riled up.
As far as I can trace, it comes from some news a few years back about how Target removed the word “Christmas” from their advertising (briefly) and maybe the story about a few merchants who gave employees rules about appropriate holiday greetings. (But that’s not really what this post is about, so let’s not get caught up in that.)
When I first saw the cheesy status update, I posted on my Facebook Page:
Not everyone is Christian. Keep that in mind when choosing your holiday cards, greetings and email subject headings. Be thoughtful, not prideful or fanatical, and make the choices that are right for your business & your audience.
Some really great comments and questions arose. Is Happy Holidays okay? But what holiday are we talking about? Some groups don’t even celebrate the New Year on January 1. Is Peace on Earth okay? Sure, that’s great on cards and such, but weird to say as a verbal greeting.
It’s not really about the Christmas greetings, so let’s move past that. But that conversation made me think more about how people often include references to religion in their marketing.
It’s been lingering in the back of my head for quite some time. I’ve seen it in website bios and welcome messages. Things like, “I thank God for my wonderful clients and community.” I’ve seen people list Christian, Believer, Follower of Christ, etc, in their Twitter profiles that are used for business. Ditto for Facebook and Google+, both in profiles and on pages.
I’m a big fan of using personality in your marketing. Cleary, since I wrote an ebook about it. And I think that one’s religion and activity within a group can certainly be considered part of one’s personality. But we need to be sure that the inclusion of god and religious references is mindful and carefully considered.
Why? Because not everyone is your religion. And religion is a touchy subject often woven with extreme emotion. Putting a reference to god on your site may steer away an otherwise really ideal client. That might be okay with you, but be mindful that it could happen.
I went into a local locksmith shop last year to have some keys made. The same owner has been there since I was a kid, and he’s always had the 10 Commandments displayed in the front window. I’m not a fan of that, but I like to frequent local businesses (and I was having breakfast next door) so I went in. While I waited for the keys to be made, I realized that a very extremist Christian radio program was playing, loudly. There were several pamphlets on the counter with religious messages. There was a rather graphic pamphlet regarding a political reproductive health care topic. I was really uncomfortable, and if he didn’t already have my keys in his hand I would have left immediately.
I will never go back there. I will wait in line for an hour at Home Depot to have keys made. And that’s okay. It’s his business and if that’s the message he wants to put out that’s none of my concern, I’ll go elsewhere.
Yes, that’s a dramatic example, but consumer choices happen like that all the time. In choosing between two great websites for local MT’s, a potential client may choose someone else if a religious reference appears on your site. Conversely, a client may choose you because of that reference.
You must know your audience. You must consider the thoughts of potential clients. You must decide how inclusive and exclusive you wish to be in every area of your marketing, and the realities of sustaining your business with the choices you make. That includes your website copy, paper brochures, greeting cards and even the words you choose when speaking with people.
I worked in retail pharmacy for many years, in a very diverse neighborhood. We always said, “Have a nice holiday.” We did that all the time, around December holidays, spring holidays, even for arbor day and flag day. The customers loved it. I like finding reasons to celebrate every day, anyhow.
Consider your word choices carefully, or don’t. Just know that every aspect of your marketing is a choice about who you want to draw in and who you want to push away.
Have a wonderful National Noodle Ring Day, or if you’re getting to this late, perhaps National Violin Day.
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- Gentle Steps, Quiet Successes, and a Happy New Year
{ 22 comments… read them below or add one }
I think I hit the wall a few years back with the “pc” happy holidays. It is Christmas, a holiday I happen to celebrate! If a client is looking on my fb page and choosing not to see me because I say I’m Catholic, then I am not the massage therapist they should see. This world is becoming very vanilla. Instead of embracing and learning about others beliefs and allowing them to express them in any way they choose, we say happy holidays and hope that doesn’t offend anyone. We are losing out as a society, Merry Christmas!
It’s interesting to me, because I think very few people are actually OFFENDED by any particular greeting, decorating or celebration. And no doubt we all have kick-ass clients who appreciate variety as much as we do.
When I worked in pharmacy, it was a VERY diverse community. I watched a new hire flail when she asked a child wearing a yarmulke if he was excited about the Easter bunny. Sigh. The parent was gracious, but really, it was kind of embarrassing on our end.
Kerry, you’ve nailed it. You have thought about your feelings, and decided you don’t mind if it narrows your audience slightly (but really, it probably won’t).
I love this post Allissa, and I think you are the perfect example of using personality marketing. Reader’s need only briefly scan one of your blog headlines, and they can get a picture of your view of the world. They will either relate to you, or they will run like scared little babies.
Here’s my two cent response.
I am not ashamed of my religious beliefs, nor do I think they have a place in any sort of professional activity that I pursue. My religious beliefs are irrelevant to the clients that I work with……the question I have to answer is, are their beliefs, values, etc., in conflict with mine? If so, I can’t work with them.
Recently I received a request to coach from a man who lives in a foreign country. He is a Muslim and had expressed in his intake form that his beliefs had forbidden him to interact with any woman (which I clearly am, despite the occasional hormone hair.) When I asked why he had chosen to seek coaching from a woman in another country, he said “Recently I watched a video where the Dalai Lama said ‘the world will be saved by the western woman’ and I respect him. This goes against everything I’ve been taught and everything I currently believe, but if this is possible, then I must understand why. I need to understand western women, and I need to understand you.”
Interesting, yes…..but is this my ideal client? Perhaps in this instance, too much of my personality will come out and it will erode the potential coach/client relationship. I can easily see how the coaching could become less about his personal needs and more about me. I’m not sure that I fit the mold of a common western woman, by any stretch, and I certainly do not want that responsibility.
All that said, I believe religion and professional interaction are a little like oil and vinegar. Sometimes you shake them together and they taste great, but sometimes they are to be kept separate. That’s how God, Allah, Macy’s, Jimmy Choo, or whomever you worship as your guide meant it to be
Awesome post!!!!
(Now, can you do a post about how a person can link to this blog?”
Copy & paste the URL?
I wonder if the situation is different when considering something like coaching vs massage therapy. I don’t think it’s the best comparison.
As massage therapists, we don’t usually NEED to be involved in someone’s personal beliefs. Nor do they need to know ours. If a potential client shows up at our office and preaches any particular doctrine, that’s an issue. Ditto if an MT does that to a client. I think the boundaries are much more clear in massage, since we don’t require the same level of intellectual and emotion conversation as coaching (life, business or otherwise).
It’s much easier to avoid, or change, conversation with a massage client than to deal with deep-seated racial or gender feeling in a coaching client.
But again, exploring your feelings and being mindful of the results of your words is the key.
What I HATE with a passion, is my kids can’t wear their Halloween costumes to school…I remember back in elementary school, that was the best time ever! Now, they just have pajama day and they can wear them and bring a blanket.
Good topic. Targeting a niche group, like members of a particular religion can be a smart marketing approach if you have a niche product like selling bibles; but I think success in this domain is rare. More common, is targeting a political groups e.g. Fox News; Credo Mobile; & of course United Colors of Benetton became famous for it’s liberal leanings. This form of niche marketing has proven to be much more successful than the more narrow religious focus. I personally dislike religious oriented marketing, but am often happy when I find businesses that are more progressive, like myself, and unhappy when I find myself at the counter of overtly conservative businesses (one thing that drives me nuts is when businesses play Fox News). A bit of a quagmire. The more common approach is to keep business apolitical & areligious. Neutral. But not everyone likes vanilla either.
I am amused and frustrated by people who tell me that we are not ALLOWED to wish people a Merry Christmas. Of course, we are allowed to say anything we want, as long as it’s not hateful or obscene.
It is not the minority groups who have forced merchants into changing their policies.
I am not a Christian, but I have never been offended by someone wishing me a Merry Christmas. I smile and save “Thanks. Have a wonderful holiday!” I am always pleased to accept cheerful greetings.
Merchants have changed their policies because they don’t want to offend or alienate ANY customers. They want ALL customers to feel comfortable and accepted — and buy lots of stuff in their stores.
I have been in establishments similar to Allisa’s locksmith. I went into a chiropractor’s office once, and painted on the wall of the entrance-way, in large letters, was a very Christian message. I did not feel comfortable or accepted there, and decided to take my business elsewhere. If the chiropractor’s goal was to limit her clientele to members of her own church, she probably succeeded!
The whole “allowed” thing got to me, too!
Thanks for your thoughtful post. It’s a tiny tightrope to walk when religion comes up with a client. For a long time when they were christian, I was Christian, when they were Hindu, I was also, Buddhist, etc. Now it just feels right to just refocus the subject back to massage. Otherwise I have had clients start to cross a boundary into what I consider my personal beliefs which are frankly none of their business and not relevant to the session at all. I have found myself getting frustrated in session defending a belief, which is totally inappropriate. Clients to try to engage, especially the proselytizing type. It does no good for the session at all. That being said I have dropped a nail tech friend who is born again and wants to bible talk, and it’s just annoying to me. So I steer clear when I can.
Allissa, this is a great topic. It reminds us that a social conscious is out there, especially on Facebook. When a gargantuan & highly-profiled company like Facebook separates “church and marketing”, as you say, into “Profiles and Pages”, there is a separation of personal and business created and mass-implemented. I’d rather use “professional” instead of business in the latter association because we profess, as religions with a set of rules do, and if we are creating commodity, the social [personal] component augments, like you describe, the professional [business] representation. I have made it a point to Like massage Pages with my massage Page identity because, personally, I have other interests that people that see me for my business don’t need to be involved in. And likewise with my Friends: they don’t need to see my profession all the time.
Again, as you mention, the focus of the types of Friends or Likes you are looking for can be reflected on either type of identity on Facebook by the type of Friends or Likes you have associated with.
I think separation of personal & business is a more basic reference to your article title and brilliantly played to evoke an emotional response that may actually support the separation of church & marketing/personal & business.
But why separate?
I think, ultimately, it comes down to not only good business sense (keeping the market open to clients who are only looking for business reasons to patronize) but also to the fact that if we are in fact healthcare providers (as some states and clients and doctors recognize, but not enough IMHO), we need to be accessible to all clients. Discrimination by association [of religion, gender, physical or mental ability, etc] is a preference that healthcare practitioners, by their nature cannot afford: both professionally & personally.
Sometimes I feel like a reader gets a whole different meaning from a post than what I was intending to write. This is one of those times.
While the idea for this topic originated from Facebook interaction I wasn’t directing the ideas in the article towards social media marketing specifically.
I’ve written (and given a webinar, and written the ebook) about the boundaries of personal and professional before. I think it’s clear that I’m generally opposed to the strict to ‘keep it all separate’ school of thought. We are in a relationship economy and I feel one of the best ways to market your business is to make it personal. It’s also way more fun. Further, I believe that one can do that quite ethically and still maintain good boundaries.
I’ve covered that. This piece was INTENDED to be specifically about religion, and to spread the notion that it is wise to be mindful of how and if you choose to include religious reference in ALL of your marketing materials (and behaviors) online and offline. I chose the title because it rang familiar to me, in the current political climate and public debates occurring about religion. Note the question mark at the end. I’m not saying what is right or wrong. I cannot possible make that decision for anyone but myself. I stated that in the comments when a reader asked that very question under my original facebook post. I’m encouraging thoughtfulness and perspective.
(Also, I don’t need to be considered a healthcare provider by anyone but my client. I LIKE the flexibility of being on the periphery of ‘healthcare’. If I wanted to have more clinical, less personal relationships with my clients, I would be a PT, or I would be an MT who specializes in a different type of work.)
Many years ago, I used to take my car to a mechanic whose business sign said “God works here, too”. While I never saw God in the shop or behind the counter, the owner of the business was a firm believer. I later discovered he had gotten very close to God when, as a miner, he was trapped underground during a mining accident. He never once tried to convert me and we never talked religion except when he told me his backstory.
One of my favorite restaurants in town is certified Halal. It’s on the sign at the register and in the windows. Never will you see a religious message in the restaurant, but they are letting people know that the food is prepared in accordance with their beliefs and, if you are muslim, it’s ok to eat there. They are also open during Ramadan (that’s willpower, people!). Again, we all know their religion, but no one is offended by the message.
I teach students that, if they use a symbol to tell people their religious or political beliefs, they will attract certain clientele and repel others. If you see that as a market opportunity to target a certain group, then by all means do so. Just don’t be surprised when others choose not to use your services. I also tell them that religion and politics do not belong in the massage room. They are both topics about which people are very passionate. And passion is not relaxing. So when my clients start talking politics (I live in the state capital, it’s our main industry) or religion, I simply tell them, “Let’s change the subject because this is adding to your stress, not relieving it.”
I don’t really care if you wish me a Merry Christmas. Just try to wait until after Thanksgiving.
Noted.
Kelli said, “I teach students that, if they use a symbol to tell people their religious or political beliefs, they will attract certain clientele and repel others. If you see that as a market opportunity to target a certain group, then by all means do so. Just don’t be surprised when others choose not to use your services.”
This is exactly my feelings on the subject. Massage, like life, can be a very polarized profession. Not everyone in massage is a Universal Cosmic Energy-Vegan-Yoga Practitioner, although I teach massage at a school that is very much aligned with that way of thinking. Regardless of the fact I sometimes find issue with some of our elective courses (not core curriculum), I love the people there and increasingly we get folks from just about every walk and rhyme of life. I love variety!
But aye, the Merry Christmas debate… Life is WAY more than holiday greeting choices. If someone asks my faith, I share. I think it’s what I’m called to do if someone asks. I will often discuss ways God has blessed my life. If I know someone is a believer, I’ll wish them Merry Christmas. Otherwise I’ll usually Happy Holiday them and get on with life.
I’m not overtly preachy, but I’m not hiding myself, either. I feel what I put out, I will also attract. (What we normally call Karma is the Bible, too.
I’m not the battery (healer), just the jumper cables. I hope to grow a basis of people who know I am a believer and that also believe where the healing is coming from. Whatever will be will be. I trust my needs will be met, due to a dash of spice tempered with a measure of vanilla, so to speak.
My christian faith is how i survive day by day, however, when I work on a client that topic is not discussed unless they ask, then I tell them, and it really dosen’t bother to much that ppl say happy holidays, or merry Christmas, simply because I know the real reason for the holiday and season, But I am going to say merry christmas and that should not offend anybody no matter their faith if they one because I am just saying a phrase and not pushing my belief on them, as far as clients go, they will choose whatever therapist they want no matter if we say happy holidays or merry christmas, and as a therapist it is my job to give them the best massage possible and help them relieve their pain and lower their stress nothing more than that because thats what they pay to do for them and that has nothing to do with my Christian faith.
What works for you, works for you! But keep in mind, what YOU thing “should” offend someone is coming from YOUR perspective.
I agree that it’s unlikely you’ll lose a client based simply on a greeting. Just be sure you absorbed the rest of the post, because it wasn’t just about holiday greetings. Your Twitter handle, profile and your public messages all proclaim your faith. WHICH IS WONDERFUL, I am not saying otherwise. Just be sure to acknowledge that this is a thoughtful decision regarding your marketing, and it may draw some clients to you, as well as push other potential clients away.
The same can be said about listing specific modalities ahead of others, or choosing a particularly masculine or feminine color scheme for one’s marketing materials. These should all be mindful decisions. Like every aspect of your business!
Merry Christmas to you & yours.
“Merry Christmas” doesn’t offend me, although I’m a devout member of a religion that doesn’t celebrate it. Christmas is, however, an annoyance and stress for me. While a greeting isn’t going to change my perception of you, I do actively go out of my way to avoid businesses with Christmas music and decorations. And holiday cards of any kind go straight in the trash.
Want to know what would get my business for life? Someone who asked me if I celebrated Christmas, joked about it a little with me when I said no, found out why, did some research, and then sent me a “Happy Ayyam-i-Ha! Good luck with your fasting next month!” note in late February. I’m not entitled to it, it’s totally above and beyond excellent service, and it’s never happened to me. But I can dream, right?
As a Jew, it doesn’t offend me to be wished Merry Christmas, all it does is simply tell me about the person doing the ‘wishing’ … that they are living in their own world, unaware of other’s differences.
It points out to me they are either uneducated, unaware or not thinking, and on auto-pilot…none of which are good.
So, good convo & Happy Winter to you all!
~Irene
I’m fortunate, as a Buddhist, to belong to a religion that relatively few Americans find offensive. I do say on my website, explicitly, that I’m Buddhist (although you have to dig around for a while to find that.) The place where it gets tricky, I think, is when your religious practice is intertwined with your massage practice — as often with the Healing Touch people, I think. And as it is with me.
If at all possible, I meditate for couple minutes before a massage, trying to clear my own agendas out of my head and make myself perfectly open to what will benefit my client. Massage is actually, for me, very much a religious practice: almost a form of meditation. But I don’t tell my clients that. I don’t usually tell anyone that. I have little silent prayers that go at the beginning and the end of a session, which I ordinarily do as I’m washing up before and after (they double as timers to make sure I wash thoroughly.) But that’s *my* religious practice, not theirs. They don’t need to know about it, and most of them probably wouldn’t want to know it.
I feel like it would be very and pushy to let people know that I do those things. I’m a little uneasy even about admitting to it here. As a member of a very small minority religion, I’m acutely aware that most of my clients belong to other religions or to none.
Er, sort of rambling here, sorry! Past my bed-time
Interesting topic. I recently had a client tell me how angry she was with the governor of our state for his comments on calling the tree a “Holiday” tree instead of a “Christmas” tree. I think he was trying to do the right thing but it seemed to offend a lot of people (present company excluded). As to whether or not people get offended by wishing them a Merry Christmas, well, I’ve been on the receiving end of one very angry Jehovah’s Witness that I wished a Merry Christmas to. It was back in the 80′s and I was working at a diner. He & his wife were regular customers and I had no idea of their religious preferences. It was an innocent well wish that caused me more than I bargained for. I have been saying Happy Holidays since that time, both for my own peace and so as not to offend.
I love this thread of conversation, I think there has been some really good points made.My client and associate base is very diverse.They are all aware of what my commitment is when it comes to faith because I am very open about it, Having tried many of the isms and ologies on my spiritual journey I can usually relate to where they are and when I don’t I try to learn about their faith. I don’t try to convert people, if the conversation leans to why I believe what I do I am transparent.We each make our choice in due time as we mature our views may easily change. I am open about my convictions and have a presence on Facebook and linkedin for other like minded people to discuss how their faith plays a big roll in the interactions they face.I have an international following which I love because it opens my eyes to a more global view.
my group is called and I am a “Christian Massage Therapist”.
Dea Henson
I am not uneducated or on auto pilot when I say Merry Christmas. I say Merry Christmas because I want to. I don’t say it to everyone and I don’t shove it people’s faces. I try to think more about what is going on in a person’s life during a particular holiday before I make grandiose wishes. If someone is recently widowed, divorced, or had a recent parental death, wishing them a hearty “Merry Christmas” would remind them of their hurt and loss. I am careful with words, but I do choose Merry Christmas because of “my” faith. Although, if someone responded with “I’m Jewish” then I would smile and wish them the appropriate greeting and maybe even engage in a conversation to learn something about them.